Meet Ty Kwan Dough, he is your friend Yung Dumb Hoe's son. At the tender age of 4 he is a real piece of work that needs some fine tuning. You love kids, so when your friend Yung Dumb Hoe asks you to watch his lil bad ass you were all in. Except you had no idea just what you were IN for. Not only do you have Ty Kwan Dough for the weekend, but you have you sister's 2 kids.Your neighbor's 3 kids have also been invited over.
You have already had to talk to Ty Kwan Dough about touching things that don't belong to him, hitting the other children and cussing and he hasn't been at your house but 30 mins. Your mind is already made up that you won't be volunteering your services to his lil bad ass no more but for the rest of the time he is visiting, you are determined to make the most of it.
All the kids are in the gated backyard playing, while you watch them from the window as you prepare some lunch.You do a quick count and 2, 4, 5.....oh shit you are missing a kid ! You slow down a minute and do another quick count but this time you start calling out names. James, De'Shawn, Lil Man, Myesha, Myshelle, Ty Kwaaaaaaaan? Oh shit where the fuck is Ty Kwan Dough? As quickly as possible you run out to the backyard and start looking around while you ask the other kids where is Ty? Lil' man points his finger towards the east side of the yard and when you follow his finger you find Ty Kwan Dough's lil bad ass on the other side of the gate. WTF? Dude is all of 2' 5" how in the hell did he climb a 5' 7" fence?
You start yelling Tyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! Get back here as you take off towards the front of the house. Ty thinks its a game of chase and takes off towards the busy street at the end of the block. Faster and Faster you run trying to catch this kid before some asshole who thinks this is Speedway turns the corner and does 65 up your block. Just before the little guy makes it to the corner you snag a piece of his shirt and snatch him up.
Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew! Safe you think as Ty Kwan Dough starts yelling put me down bitch, put me down! With his hand raised in your face he says it again and when you don't put him down he slaps you and for a minute you forget he is a kid and prepare to whoop him like a stranger on the street. As you regain your senses, you quickly make your way back up to the house and find a belt to whoop his lil ass with. Discussion, beat down, lunch, and nap all in that order. By the time Yung Dumb Hoe returns for her kid, he is resting and all the other kids are in the living room watching cartoons.
You start explaining to Yung Dumb Hoe the events of the day and watch her face get twisted when you get to the part about whooping her lil bad ass kid. Her yelling and screaming starts with bitch don't you ever put your hands on my kid again. She points a finger in your face and tells you its all your fault that he got out the yard, you should have never left them outside playing without supervision.You push her finger out your face and give her the business about how bad her kid is and how you had no idea his bad ass would be able to climb over a fence meant to keep them safe while you prepared lunch. Not to worry, he WON'T be coming back over your house you say and grab his things, hand them to her and escort Yung Dumb Hoe and Ty Kwan Dough up on out your crib. Now you know why she can never keep a babysitter.
While the scenario may be fake. It has some truth to it. The saying goes it takes a village to raise a kid, and when I was coming along if your ass was acting up and a neighbor got wind of it, they would beatcha ass and send you home, and when you got home your momma would be waiting on you with a belt, switch, shoe, extension cord, telephone cord, or whatever was available ready to beat you down again.Hell I can remember a time when my neighbors Jermaine and Mario's dad beat them with a iron rod. No shit! Kids getting whoopings from neighbor's was like an unspoken law, universal amongst the neighborhood parents and nobody had any beef with it. The ratio of ass kicking's handed down from neighbors is low in comparison to the ones I got at home. Public outburst of bad behavior could get you killed, brought back to life and killed again in our house. My momma didn't care who's kid it was. If the kid was at our house then the kid got OUR beatdowns. Nobody ever had any problems with that.
In today's society you can't just do that. Well you can but you stand the chance of getting your ass in serious hot water.Today's parents don't want anyone else putting a hand on their kids. They have all subscribed to the theory that an ass whooping from time to time is not necessary and time out is what really works. Ha! In my opinion that method may work for SOME kids but a kid like bad ass Ty Kwan Dough will need to meet Susie Sunshine ( my belt ). Or you have the parent who just doesn't do anything about the child's behavior but ignore it and will be the main one crying when they escort his little ass down to the county jail for doing some shit that he has no business. That's why I tell all parents of kids staying with me, if you don't want your child to get a whooping for acting up don't leave them here with me. I will fuck a kid up, like Burnie Mac likes to say hit em in the throat and watch their teeth click! I usually don't have to do this but every now and again shit happens and I take care of shit. Don't get me wrong I love the kids and I know how to get down on their level for whatever reason necessary.Every child is different and I understand that, but know this as well, I just don't tolerate bad behavior or disrespect. I had to snatch a kid up this weekend during a birthday party, because she just couldn't get it through her little skull that I was the grown up and she was the child. It only took for me to snatch that arm up and get real close to her face and speak through clinched teeth for us to get an understanding. For the rest of the day, she put her neck rolls and snappy come backs in her book bag and found herself something productive to do.
These events got me to thinking about how I will respond to Chardae ( due August 28th ) getting a whooping from someone other than me. I'm sure at first I will be a lil squeamish about it, but truth be told if I send my kid with you, then I know you, trust you and expect for you to up hold the same rules in your house as I do in mine in regards to my child. I also don't expect for Chardae to be a holy terror either. It is my responsibility first and foremost to be sure that she knows how to behave with others, however like most kids, I'm sure she will be testing some folks to see how far she can actually push you. So tell me parents....How do YOU feel about someone else spanking your kid(s) ?
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